You can't stop the waves but you can learn to surf.

"You may not control all the events that happen to you but you can decide not to be reduced by them."- Maya Angelou

 

 Every one of us, if given the chance could tell a story about our lives.  Some may have caused a mere ripple while others go deeper.

 

Stories may be similar to the listener but to the one who "owns" it, it has an entirely different effect.  It may be life-changing, it may be crippling, it may be life-altering, good or bad.  It may define you for the rest of your life.

 

All of our stories though similar in the telling, for some, is but a portion of the outcome.  How we choose to respond is significant in the conclusion.

 

Many of us map out our lives to our liking.  Sometimes it looks selfish sometimes it looks generous.  Always it looks perfect because who would map out their life to include pain, disappointment and sorrow?

 

Our failure is when we place all of our hope on the life that WE mapped out, so that when the unexpected happens it can completely throw us off course.  We become vulnerable. we become unsure of what to do because this wasn't in our plans".  We become uncomfortable feeling ill equipped to maneuver this unplanned disruptive course.

 

I think when life throws us a curve it is often a hard ball to catch.  Sometimes it is easy to shake off.  Sometimes it shakes us to the core.  I believe that when we are thrown off course, when our map starts winding in directions we didn't plan, we experience stages much like those of grief.

 

In no way do I, have I, or will I ever always follow these suggestions. 

 

First and foremost Pray- It is easy to pray and say I am going to give it to God however sometimes our human hearts do not easily allow us to relinquish it all to Him.

 

Be Honest-

 

Even if your map has one or many detours in it, don't think you have failed.  Face it head on. (I am not good at this) The more we make excuses the longer it takes to face the truths and get back on course.  Being angry and hurt are acceptable feelings and is part of being honest with yourself.  For me the sooner I can start thinking clearly. (Not to be confused with actually taking steps- that could take me eons) the quicker I feel resolve.

 

Be Open-

 

So your map got messed up and now you have to face something that threw you off course.  It may be something that is hard to let go of but holding on can make us resentful.  It may lead you on a journey that was never close to being on your map.  Embrace it (after you have hated it) It may produce good changes.

 

 

Be Kind-

 

Even if what has happened in your life is your fault, be kind to yourself and forgive yourself.  Talk to yourself lovingly- you may be the only one at that point who does.  Our actions have to come from the heart.  Let your action of choice be love.

 

Trust-

 

That even though your life may NOT be following the course you mapped out, it may be turning out exactly as it was meant to be.

 

Go with the flow

 

Doesn't even make sense to anyone who has their life 'mapped out" I have to remind myself(often) that when I try to create the life I alone want, it is then that I am thrown off course.  Choosing how I respond can put me back on the correct path.

 

Have courage-

 

Because when something unexpected happens you may just discover what you are truly in search of.

 

 

 

  

 

 

My child will do it different

The beginning of another school year is only 9 days away.  Like most mothers the last few days of summer break are filled with getting school supplies, figuring out new schedules, and leaving behind the more flexible schedules.

It has been many years since I sent a child into their first year of high school , and though times have changed the apprehensions have not.
Freshman nerves are already displaying themselves. 

Pretty words like, be yourself, be a leader not a follower, Make good choices, does nothing to soothe the fears.

I have to be honest this ride is not easy for this mama either.  I know that the moment our children begin school we " Send them out " to be influenced by others but sending them into high school they are so vulnerable.  There are more opportunities for independence, more opportunities to be tempted, more circumstances for them to make choices that can impact their lives.

   I mean in grade school when you color a person blue- it does nothing to change your life.   Guys High school is peer pressure on steroids!

Do I think my son will make good choices? yes most of the time.
Does he want to fit in? Absolutely!
Will he make any bad choices? there is that chance!
Is he a good kid? Yes he is
Do good kids make bad choices? yes they do!

When I started school in the 60's and my adult children in the 80's/90's times were different but feelings were not.

I am guilty of thinking at times "My child will do it differently"

Different than who?  Different than what? 
Better?
Different than we may want them to that is what.
Peer pressure is enormous and" the way " they may have been taught is at risk or being swept under the rug even if only temporarily.

Do I like that ? NO

Do kids need to fail to learn?  Yes they do.

Even great kids are not always great!  Boundaries will be stretched, experiences will be had. 

Our teens are facing issues in our present day world that are just ugly.  how do we shield them from it all?  We can't.

We can pray for them, we can be an example for them, we can love them through all the choices they make good and bad.  We can show them the Grace that was given us.

High school isn't for sissies!

Good luck Cameron may your dreams of being an orthodontist come true! Seem premature since he is a freshman?  Well in  2015 In our district you choose your high school based on what your career choice is! So he will be in a medical program and have his first year of college completed when he graduates!

UGH- Give me Romper Room!

Rilah Marie has something to say .

Let me start by introducing myself.  I am Rilah Marie.  3rd grandchild of Nana who is helping me write this post.

 
I am 7 weeks old today and my big sister Audrey and cousin Alden told me nana would be helping me express myself on her blog.  They said "don't think you are going to get out of it."  I guess this is one of those moments that can be defined as indulging Nana.

I think the first was when I was 3 days old and had a photo shoot similar to what a super model would have to endure.  "Just do it they said, it will pay off later"

SO here I am!  My first week was a whirlwind of learning.  I mean before my birth I had no complaints about where I was.  I did nothing for myself, and suddenly I have to work at getting my food.  I first met mommy, daddy and Nana.  They all cried and seemed pretty happy to see me. 

My first full day someone called Grammy and Pops brought my big sister Audrey to meet me.  Wow was she excited and someday I may just have to remind her of that!

This is us! I love her!

Sometimes when I cry she tells me "it's ok"  I know someday I will have fun playing with her.

 

  

 

These pictures below are only a sample of what Nana put me through!

 

Shhhhh I have a secret.  Nana told me I was the BEST behaved for my newborn pictures.  Sorry Audrey and Alden!

 

You guys told me to "suck up early" Thanks for the advise!

 

 

 

 

 

This is my family !

 

 

 

 

 

I had a great few weeks getting to know my family!

 

Grammy and Pops were close by to give sister Audrey some great 1:1 time while mommy and daddy got used to me!  I am pretty easy to love though!

 

So I am pretty happy I landed in this family. 

 

I know that Mommy will be my biggest fan;

Daddy will be my fierce protector;

Nana will be the biggest sappy pushover  sentimentalist;

Gramps will cuddle and ride bikes with me;

Grammy will have pictures of every event for me;

Pops- He will play ANYTHING with me;

Uncle Cameron won't let anyone hurt me;

I haven't met Uncle Bryan yet but I will;

Uncle Mike will teach me, well pretty much anything I want to know;

Auntie Mere will keep me girly;

Cousin Alden and sister Audrey will likely get me in trouble be my best friends.

 

SO I figure I left the comfort of my mama, but I feel Blessed about this life I have been given.

 

How did I do Nana?

 

 

 

Just swell precious!