Birth is how you get here, love is how you grow!

 Because I have a 45 minute drive to work I often utilize this time for my quiet time, either with God or with my own scrambled thoughts.  Before turning off the radio the other day though, I was informed it was " National trim your nose hair day" Really?  What flag do we fly for that?  Is there nothing more worthy to celebrate than trimming our nose hairs?  Made turning off the radio much easier!

I often think about my life as a mother, probably because I am so passionate about it. Having been given the Blessing of raising another child after giving birth to 2 was not something that I would have necessarily said was in my lifelong plan.  How thankful I am that it is God's plan that prevails and not my own.

I know I am not unique in having birth children and an adoptive child. ( I sometimes hate that word) I have such mixed feelings about it because, through adoption I became a mother to a wonderful baby boy, but because of adoption people don't always see them as yours. 

I have thought of this a lot recently however have been inspired by a friends, blessings and struggles with international adoptions and her story has only emphasized my thoughts.

The reason I struggle at times with the word adoption is because I am, often forced to use it.  My son is African American so the differences are obvious, which leads many people to ask about his position in our family.  "Is he adopted"? "Is he a foster child"? How long have you had him ? and this one I always love Where did you get him? 

People he came into the world in the same manner as you and any birth children you may have been Blessed with.  Cameron's position in our family is only different because of his birth order, not because of how he became a member of our family. 

I am not blind to the challenges that may come Cameron's way as he ages, or the feelings he has at times now about his birth, but my eyes are wide open to the opportunities to love him and have him know that he is a family member by choice.   My eyes and heart catch every wide toothed grin when we are all together and he is doing something with his older siblings, or we have family portraits taken and there is Cameron with his Beautiful brown skin and huge brown eyes, looking so very different yet fitting in so very well.

My heart melts when he does school projects and his dad is his inspiration, and his brother Mike is his hero, and his sister is going to make him an aunt (all his words) and his mom well she "Loves me"  that is really all that matters.  And when someone asks in his presence, how many children do you have? and I respond with 3 - he NEVER lets me get away with that.  Because his sister and brother are grown and married we have 2 additional children and he is so right in how he gets that, it doesn't matter how you come into a family, you are no less family.

As I shared, I never said "one day I think I will adopt" it just happened.  I will be honest I always wondered after having my children and falling so in love with them if anyone who adopted felt that same love- I can say without conviction yes!

I am the same mother bear with Cameron as I was with Mike and Ashley.  I will defend him when right, teach him when wrong, and love him through it all

It doesn't matter why or how you have come to make the choices you have made in your life it is what you do with it that matters, just as it doesn't matter how you came to be a member of a family, just that you are.

As I have told Cameron many times when talking about his birth, and what he now knows "I grew in mommy's heart not in mommy's belly. 

Everyone has a different birth story- similarities of course but different.  Love though is Love, and when a mother "just loves me" that rivals any story , labor pains or not.